If you’re sad on the inside, don’t expect to show up happy on the outside.
It’s an amazing phenomenon how our inside world gets projected outwardly. We seemingly communicate the way we think and feel not just in words and non-verbals by the way we carry ourselves, facial expressions and overall body language, but also in the confidence, energy and well-being we exude without our knowledge. What’s even more interesting is that it’s hard to mask a negative self-perception with external appearances. What’s buried inside leaks out subtly in expressions we may be unaware of and that others pick up on.
It’s almost as if there is an invisible communication and energy field that operates of its own accord and relays the context of our inner dialogue – the story we inwardly tell about ourselves.
Most people can relate to the following experience. You’re miffed at a friend, colleague or spouse, without his/her knowing that you’re angry. You camouflage what you are thinking with a smile and pleasantries and act as if nothing is wrong. Yet, tension builds. You can feel it, almost cut it with a knife. You can’t swim out of the undercurrent of your thoughts and feelings. They can pull you under even if the surface looks calm.
Our self-narrative is especially important when we seek a new career opportunity. It says more about us than we can say with words.
This is more than just self talk, though. The inner ongoing story of success or failure we choose to feed ourselves creates the way we feel, and those feelings turn into an identity we relay to others, despite what our words, credentials and crisp new suit might say to the contrary.
Get yourself in the right frame of mind by adjusting your vision of yourself for your job search. Keeping a positive self-image when a job search goes on and on can be challenging, but job seekers need to be vigilant about how they interpret, judge and speak to themselves about the circumstances surrounding their search.
If you have to tell yourself a story about yourself, tell a good one!
It’s the one everyone else will hear too when they look at you.